Easter Sugar Cookies

I got the bug this week to make some spring-time sugar cookies. I decided to use Martha's recipe for Ideal Sugar Cookies and Royal Icing. The dough was pretty unforgiving but the result turned out very well. The cookies were soft and buttery but nice and thin. I really like the royal icing because it's easy to work and dries to a beautiful, shiny gloss. Overall, I'd say this recipe isn't for the faint of heart but if you are looking for a tasty challenge then give it a try.

The Fountainhead

Sometimes things come into your life at just the right time and for me this book was one of them. I started reading at the end of last summer and in the midst of school would pick it up occasionally and chip away at it. It's written by Ayn Rand, author of Atlas Shrugged, a book I read a few years ago and found very relevant. Too me books like these are must reads because they are a huge part of our culture. They are still frequently referenced today and you may have even quoted it without realizing what you were talking about because they are so ingrained in our vocabulary. Therefore, I think The Fountainhead has value to the average reader even if doesn't affect you in the same way it did me.

The book is a novel written in the 1940s by a Russian expatriot living in the U.S., which I think adds credibility to her political commentary, but that is not what struck me in this book. The premise of the book is that selflessness is the ultimate degradation of the human soul. This sounds pretty crazy but when you think about it -- it is so amazingly poignant.

Here is a brief summary of the characters:

Howard Roark is an architect. He is great and therefore has a difficult time breaking into the business because the professional standards are to borrow from ideas of the past. He is the caricature of selfishness in that he builds buildings for his own pleasure, to make the world a better place for himself by having created something that he knows is great. The book chronicles his struggles in finding success in a world that is full of people who are "selfless."

Roark's counterpart is Peter Keating. They start their careers at the same time and Keating immediately rises to the top of the architecture world by becoming popular, meeting the right people and designing buildings that are nothing spectacular but are good enough. By the end of the book Keating is the picture of "selfessness." He has become unrecognizable even to himself because he has sold his soul in the process of trying to become great.

The masses are the third caricature. These people despise greatness because it shows their own ineptitude. The masses are lead by the opinions of others, namely Elsworth Toohey, an architecture opinion column writer. Toohey praises mediocrity in an attempt to destroy greatness and obtain power for himself. He preaches the doctrine of selflessness in terms that are not unfamiliar to us: pity, benevolence, public spirit, social consciousness.

The book follows the interplay of these characters ultimately showing the reader that the selflessness is the great sin. First of all we have to address the definition of selflessness. If you break down the word into parts you see that it literally means a quality of being without self and when this definition is applied to the word I think Ayn Rand is absolutely right. When we are without self we do no service to ourselves or the world around us. We become a waif, blown about by the whims and opinions of others. The self is what makes us unique. It is what makes us alive.

This was especially pertinent to me because for several years I have been trying to become the picture of selflessness. I felt that in order to be a good Christian, to become more like Christ, I had to abandon my desires. My life became an experiment in seeing how much I could possibly let go of, how I could let myself be shaped and changed. Last fall I reached a point where I felt there was nothing left to me. I literally felt as if my opinions, likes and desires, suppressed for so long, had faded away to nothing. The memory of who I had been before seemed distant and unknowable. I feel that I have reached the depth of selflessness and after having been there I never want to go back.

I am thinking that after having my world shaken by medical problems I felt the control I once had on my life was gone. My coping mechanism was to surrender the rest and become a shadow. I now realize that was a great mistake. I have never been a fan of the "finding yourself" rhetoric but I do feel I am now on a quest to find my self.

Easy Baby Quilt and Applique Burp Cloth

This is a baby quilt and burp cloth I made as a gift for a friend (Ethney, hope you're not checking my blog the night before your shower!)

The print is a Michael Miller print I found at JoAnn's and the backing is solid brown flannel. It's a simple pattern--sew two rectangles with wrong sides together. Turn it right sides out and iron. In my copious amounts of class time I quilted around the big flowers.

I appliqued some flowers onto the burp cloth using fusible webbing and bordered it with a decorative stitch on my sewing machine.

It was a fun project and it went together quickly!

Canister Project

Last year I posted about some canisters I found at a thrift store and had plans to refinish the wooden tops. Well, one year later the project is finished and I am quite happy with how they came out. I had to strip the wooden tops (not a fun part of the project). Then I bought some cheap acrylic craft paint at walmart and used a rag to wipe it on in a thin layer, leaving the wood grain visible. Last I sprayed them with some spray shellac (needed since the ceramic jars are shiny). Here is the before:

And the after:

Update

I hate titling a post "Update" but that's all we got for now.

In December I wrapped up my first semester of PA school. It felt like quite an accomplishment although it only means I am 1/6 of the way through. Now we are onto the module portion of the program which means we spend one week on a type of medicine, learn everything about it (that can be learned in one week), take a test and then move onto the next area. I think I like it because you always feel like you are accomplishing something. We have done two modules so far and only have about 25 more to go--sounds easy enough....

Matthew is in school still plugging away at his pre-dental prerequisites. And this really explains why our lives are so dull. When you have two people in school you don't do much else. He works really hard and I am so proud of him!

Christmas break was our first chance in a while to let loose. My parents came up to Boise and we spent a few days at Matthew's family's cabin. It was so beautiful up there with all of the snow and nice to spend time with Mom and Dad.

We spent Christmas with Matthew's family and things were pretty uneventful. It was kind of a like a big nap that we both totally needed.

A couple of weeks ago I was released as Relief Society President, which I think was timely since the pace of school has really picked up. Last Sunday was my first in a very long time that I haven't had any meetings outside of the regular ones everyone goes to...a nice feeling :)

I feel very blessed to be in school in spite of the crazy pace it gives to my life. It is fun to be learning so much and I'm excited to get out there and start practicing. I have been focusing on really trying to be happy in the moment and not be constantly thinking about the next phase of life and I think I am getting it to some degree. Life is now. It's happening to us every day. I love what President Hinckley said:

“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed.

“[The fact is] most putts don’t drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. …

“Life is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed.

“The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride” (“Big Rock Candy Mountains,” Deseret News, 12 June 1973, A4).

I am thankful for the thrilling bursts of speed and the beautiful vistas in my life.

6 More Weeks

I am delighted by the fact that there are only 3 more weeks of class until Thanksgiving break and three more weeks after that. We are sooooo ready for a break!

I often get asked how PA school is going. "Busy" is usually my answer, although I have learned that there are many who have a much higher study time tolerance than I do. I am finding out that I am not a science person, which usually raises some eyebrows--luckily there's more to being a PA than science. And let's face it, I'm not hoping to become the next Dr. House cracking the worlds most mysterious medical cases. I do really enjoy the hands on things. So far we've learned to do injections, draw blood, suture and do physical examinations. All of this I really enjoy. I also like charting, which ostracizes me from most of my classmates. What can I say? I'm a Comms major at heart.

The most challenging thing about school is being in class for 6-8 hours/day, 5 days/week. I sit on one of those big exercise balls instead of a chair (as do many of my classmates). It seems to help me stay awake (haven't fallen asleep and spilled off onto the floor yet anyway) and you can always bounce for entertainment.

I am pleased to report that my US Army stethoscope that Matthew won from a recruiter for guessing the kind of car he drove (strange...I know) seems to work great. Still, I am dreading when I am actually practicing and I have to explain to my patients that I was never in the US Army. It seems like I should come up with a better story of how I got the stethoscope....

Five Years

Matthew and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary yesterday and it's made me reflect on some of the things we've done these past five years:


June 3, 2004
I was living in NYC doing an internship with an advertising agency and living the dream, literally. Matthew flew in to visit and we spent the evening visiting the Manhattan Temple Dedication. Afterward we went for a stroll through Central Park and ended up on the tree-lined Poet's Walk cozying up on a bench where a month ago he had whispered, "I love you," into my ear. That evening we became engaged and our story began.


July 29, 2004
Megan called around first thing in the morning because I had forgotten to book an appointment to get my nails done. Luckily we found a place with an opening and rushed off for the matrimonial mani/pedi. Several hours of primping later Matthew and I were married in the Boise Temple for time and eternity. We had an incredible day with our friends and family enjoying the bliss of new love and marriage.

December 18, 2004
Matthew graduated with a B.S. in International Buisness Management and Spanish from Utah Valley State College. Whew!

April 14, 2005
I checked into LDS Hospital for a 5-day stay to have my first tumor removed. I had to arrange with all of my teachers to have my finals early and complete projects ahead of time so I could have the surgury during finals week. Additionally, the weeks prior to surgury required me to take medication to control my blood pressure and to slowly increase it until surgury. I started out taking one pill once a day and ended up taking eight pills twice a day! It the medication slowed me down immensely and, in some ways, that semester was my most difficult yet.

April 21, 2005
It was really important to me to attend my college graduation because I felt that I had worked hard to achieve that little piece of paper so when the surgeon told me I would be going under the knife one week before graduation I was determined that I would make it on the stage. My parents rented a wheel chair so I wouldn't have to walk far and Matthew pushed me around all day. I got a seat of honor on the floor of the Marriott Center with graduate students and Matthew sat close behind me. It was a long ceremony to endure even with the narcotics but I am so happy I was able to be there.

May 9, 2009
Matthew and I started our first college grad jobs. Matthew was managing a Tunex franchise in West Valley City and I was working at BYU doing marketing for the campus auxilliaries. Though my drea m was to return to NYC and start up an advertising career, it was a perfect transition considering my health and the wonderful support I received while working at BYU. My coworkers made it possible for me to have a job at that time.

July 29, 2005
I arrived in SLC airport around 7 p.m. with my parents. We had just come from Bethesda, MD where I spent the week getting a work up of tests to determine the location of my other tumors. Our first wedding anniversary was unconventional at best, but we did get to enjoy a nice dinner at our favorite restaurant.

April 2006
While driving home from General Conference I received inspiration that we needed to fulfill Matthew's life-long dream of taking a huge amount of time to travel. We spent the next nine months preparing and finally quit our jobs in December 2006 so we could have an adventure.

2007
Traveling was hard on me because I really like to have a schedule and be accomplishing things on my list but that year we learned more about eachother than we've probably learned in the other four years combined. We shared so many great experiences that we'll never forget...and created our homemade RV we like to call the "Campry." The world is so beautiful and there are so many places I can't wait to get back to!

January 21, 2008
I guess traveling does change you because I started school on a Tuesday, down the long path to becoming a physician assistant. I loved being back in school but I worked hard. Science is not my forte and it took all I had to earn what I did. Matthew was a huge support to me in this transition. I guess I inspiried him because eight months later he caught my insanity and started taking classes to prepare for dental school.

January 12, 2009
I had just had my wisdom teeth removed four days before and suffered a flu bug in the process of healing up from that so I wasn't sure I was at the top of my game but I headed off to Meridian to interview for a seat in the Idaho State Unversity PA program. The interview seemed to go well and I wasn't disappointed because just two days later we celebrated a seat offer.

May 27, 2009
We took our last chance (for the next few years) for long, international trip and flew to Cancun, Mexico for some summer fun--two months of relaxation and chaos in Centeral America.

July 29, 2009
Five years--I love you more than ever, Matthew!!!